You’ll get one when you make a wrong move that involve other people. Even jokes. Making it even worse, not just that you’re bad at making jokes, you’re also bad at cleaning messes; perhaps you’re just afraid you’ll deal another blow; perhaps you just want to contemplate what we’re you thinking; perhaps it is just you trying to mess some other people’s life.

And that’s when you get all out stress. Not to mention the disturbances and whatever you’re trying to do the whole day will go bonkers; you’ll put lots of your mind into what you did, trying to figure out why the heck you did it in the first place, trying to make yourself feel better, trying to figure out the outcomes. Works even worse when the one you’re messing up with is someone you hold dear, some important friend or something like that.Perhaps putting it as something like “capable and incapacitated” isn’t too much of an exaggeration. In fact, it is how it works when you’re in this kind of situation.

Justifying what you did won’t change a thing in this kind of situation, and you know you need to work out something on it. What’s done is done.

That would be the view when you are someone like me...and seriously, I am bad at dealing things like this...

Lesson learnt: whatever you do affects other’s life. Be practical, be more sensible, and don’t SMS craps...

Worry not, I'll get over this, and bounce back in.
Signing out...
akmalmohammad

...of the social breakdown, just too many to mention. For now, take this one; and take is as a bomb.

Increase in number of old-folks home; right when what they need the least is privacy and what we want the most is less people butting in our life.Some of the inhabitants might really need the place to continue their life safely. But most were sent there because they have became a nuisance and too much to be taken care of.

But the big question is, “Are they?”

The saying “A mother can take care of 10 children, but 10 children not necessarily can take care of one mother” is appropriate here, isn’t it?
That is one of those saddening stories you’ll see in many of such institution. Too busy, like always, tops the pile of excuses made; and I don’t deny it. This is era of all things pass by fast, and you really need to keep up with the pace.But is that an excuse you can use to, literally, dump the one who gave you birth?

That was the picture I was getting during my visit to Rumah Ehsan Bandar Al-Muktafi Billah Shah, Dungun, last Saturday. The house, unlike the typical old-folks home you may find scattered around the country, is located in a quite isolated place. Taking care of those with debilitating diseases, you will see many inhabitants are bedridden. Stroke, complicated diabetes mellitus, cerebral palsy and many more are in the what-you-will-see list. About half the inhabitants/patients are mobile. And trust me; they are deprived of what they need the most at this age; attention.

The headmistress, crews, attendants, nurse and everyone in the team did their best to tend to what they need. But I, betting my fingers on this statement, pretty damn sure that the attention they should be getting from their closest family member will win over the facilities they’re getting there. With hands down. Yes, they need professionals to take care of them because they are in the setting of not only they are old, but also are not healthy. But by dumping them at places like this? Away from home?

During our visit, one of the inhabitants passed away. If it is not due to our visit, there would only be 3 or 4 people for her “solat jenazah”. And she was a rare case whereby the body were taken home by her close family member for burial. Most of the cases, we were made understood, will be taken care of by the institution; bath to burial. No family member in the crowd.
Whose fault, what went wrong; that’s for us to think about.

Some of the pictures during the visit.

akmalmohammad

End Ramadhan blunder.

ali : eh abu, kau tau tak?
abu : tau ape li?
ali : raya tahun ni tak jadi.
abu : kau nak kena pukul kuat-kuat ke ali?

:D

Selamat Hari Raya, Maaf Zahir dan Batin.

While some might think many Moslem are in the race of getting their Quran recitation done before the end of Ramadhan, I, on the other hand, fell in love with John Grisham; an established legal thriller writer. His masterpiece, The Firm even made it to the silver screen; and from what I’ve heard, it is just too good that I might go and download it illegally from the torrent.

No, don’t get me wrong, please. I still read and love Quran more than any book, alright? It is just that the affair I’ve just fallen into lately worth a write up. So pardon the romantic kind of wordings up there. Jodi Picoult is still in my heart, in case you’re wondering; also Khaleed Hosseini. You just can’t get enough from these two people. Another one got into the growing list; now you make it this way. You’re NOT going to get enough from these three people. :D

Anyway, I was kinda disappointed for knowing about this one writer quite late. The book that captivated me was borrowed from a close friend/brother of mine in Kuantan. He got another two books of this wonderful writer that, definitely, is in my ‘gotta borrow’ list; write ups about them will come later, after I read both.

For now, it’s “The Broker”.

But of course I am not going to spoil the whole storyline in this write up. This is not a professional review, just in case you’re expecting one coming from me. What’s coming are just 2 cents from me on why the heck you should read this guy’s books. Points will be highlighted; mostly about the way Grisham delivered his story; the way the story develop; the way characters being presented; the way you’re involved in the story line. The last item will be very important, of course, because in my humble opinion, that’s how you actually get captivated and just don’t want to let the book off your hand.

In essence, “The Broker” is all about getting messy with your government. Just take it this way to make things simple; you were a lawyer by practice with suing people as your pastime activity (and apparently paid your bills). You’ve got yourself something that will definitely get you fortune so big you’ll never need to work; perhaps for several generations, each will have the opportunity to eat, wear and spend like king. That thing you have in your possession is software that will give you control over the world’s most sophisticated satellite surveillance system. The only thing you need to do is sell it to the interested party; and apparently this part is going to irritate some other parties. All of which have options that includes having you dead.

That’s the dilemma of our Joel Backman, the main character.

Adding up to the drama, one of your friends (ie; partner in crime) was killed for the same matter. The programme writers, too, are dead. Killed, needless to say. So our Mr. Backman, with the feeling of insecurity chilling up his spine, got himself to safety in a place that you’d expect the least. Prison.

What coming next will dazzle you endlessly; how corrupted the federal can be. They take you out the prison on a full pardon, send you to some foreign land, give you new identity, put you under their watch, and then leak your whereabout so that people with grudges against you can come to your door knocking and get you shot in the head. People who sent you there will, of course, sit back and enjoy the show. The only thing they wanted to know is who is coming to get you killed.

But of course, our Backman guy is one smart fella. He smelled something fishy is on the run; even his so-called protector smelled fishy. So he outsmarted this guy, get into the run, arranged things that will get him safe (you’ll see someone with some integrity at this point), get back to where he came from; his homeland, and get the stuffs cleared.

I’ll let you do the thinking with that much as the headstart. Go here to see professional reviews. You’ll see that critics are not good on this book. Partly, I agree with them. This book, as a legal thriller, is not really packed with actions; but somehow that’s the beauty of it; you’ll be much more involved with the situations, the scenes the writer wanted to convey.

In term of character development, somehow you are confined to just several characters that play major roles in the book. You’ll be with, mostly, the main character; what he do, how he eat, how he speak, how he learn new language (he’s being stashed in some foreign country, remember?). He’ll never beat Picoult in this sense; her writing is much more personal. You are everyone being mentioned in the book. But then again, everyone got their own style of writing, isn’t it?

The plot development is alright. You’ll be attached to the book, you just don’t want to let it go off you hand. The plot is quite simple, foolproof, not many twist; simply said, this is quite a leisure reading. Perhaps it is contradictory with the fact that this is a full-blown espionage, “I’m coming to kill you” kind of book. But yeah, it is not an all-out novel of people coming pointing gun at you, asking where the heck did you hid that satellite control program. You’ll be somehow involved in the storyline.

This is not professional work, so don’t quote. I’ll give 7 out of 10 for this book. This is not Grisham’s best, anyway. But hey, it kept me awake at night, eager to know what’s coming next.

I can’t wait to get my hand on his other masterpieces. Next coming would be King of Torts? Or perhaps the Firm, or perhaps his latest work, The Associate?

Abang, get ready to hand the books to me later, okay? :D

akmalmohammad

Imagine this.

You have just got promoted to another level in you office that requires you to handle cases worth millions and million bucks worth of pressures in an underhanded, bigger accountability and responsibilities, facility-like-crap government office; you have a wife with many ailments, and you have just lost one of your sons. In a motor vehicle accident.

And this son of yours, you were expecting to celebrate raya together; all of a sudden, he's gone forever.

How the heck are you going to conserve your composure in situations like this?

That's just what happened to my uncle recently. I tell you this; I have never see this guy lost himself like this before. He went all silence, didn't eat well until recently, didn't had enough sleep....you've got the gist of it.

Indeed, the Creator loves him more than any of us does. But to lose a family all of a sudden, I bet anyone would have the shock, even the aftershock.

But he made his comeback.

He talk, he started eating again, he got some sleeps (although not much; you'll definitely sleep less when you have too many things running about in your head)...but in essence, he made it through. All of his other family members did.

How?
It was the support he's been receiving, and the prayers he did.

You don't eat; then a sister of yours come close, and get the food into your mouth with her hand.
You've gone all silence; then your other brothers and sisters; sour nephew and niece come close, tell you to calm down, face the trial and tribulations with an open heart.
You had the tribulations in Ramadhan; you withstood the trials in the month of trials and blessing. If anyone got through such situation, you're indeed strong.

You see, getting through trial, for a dad, a husband, won't be an easy feat to be done. But the chance of surviving through it will tremendously improve if you have people you can rely on; people who are there for you to share the difficulties you are going through.

This is just a reminder for all of us, in this holy month. Should anyone need your help, be there. You need not be a millionaire to give help. You need not be a king to settle somebody's problem.
Sometimes all you have to do is to listen.

Alfatihah to my lost cousin. May his soul rest in peace.


akmalmohammad

Both, me and Ramadhan.

How long have I not been writing again, you ask? Well, don’t ask. The answer is a tad to shameful for me to even try to answer. Not that I don’t have things to write about; as long as it is not what I do day in and out we are referring to here because the routine is a tad too boring, never worth a mention, let alone being blogged about. Time constrain? Perhaps. But then again, I am not too busy to do anything, am I?

Let just put it this way; writer’s block. Ideas stagnated. Hands numb(Don’t.Buy.This). Pure laziness(You’ve.Got.To.Buy.This.Cash). And yeah, superslow(I.Meant.Super) connectivity helped the whole process.

Then came the auspicious, holy month of Ramadhan. I, for that, made myself a new resolution. This URL is going to live, at least better than how the past few weeks (or months) have been.

I’m sure good Moslems around the world is having a good time with the arrival of this holy month of Ramadhan. Many will start to think about what to do to improve themselves; many will think of what kind of ibaadah will they try to submit(Wow!), many might also started to think the way of celebrating ‘Eid already. Whichever way you try to celebrate this auspicious month, I’ll always reset my mind that Ramadhan is not all about fasting, and improvement shouldn’t be focused too much on this month and make another comeback of who I used to be.

But of course, being Istiqaamah is easier said than done. Agree?

Put some effort on it. Pray for it, and don’t let the whole thing being laid to only that. If that’s the whole life should be about, why the heck we are given all the ability, desire, even life? Well, if you said something about “life is all about making choice”; man, that’s is not to be refuted. So go and make your choice. You want to improve and stay improved; you want to improve and make a comeback of how you were; and you want to improve, and improve more.

Perhaps, when we are speaking about Ramadhan and getting improved, there might still be some sentiments of some section of the society that all the improvement should be about solat, zakat, zikir, and all of that kind of things. One thing to be clarified, there should be no differentiation between that and all the daily activities we do day in, day out. They might be classified as ‘ebaadah khassah’ and ’ebaada ‘aamah’. But hey, improvement shouldn’t be contained into only that. Improve everything; the way you talk, the way you befriend people, the way you respect others, the time you go to work or attend classes; all that kind of things. Simply put, everything you do in your everyday life.

Got the gist? Sure you did. In fact, you’ve been hearing all that for several times already. Now, Akmal, do you get the idea? Don’t just write about it. Do it.

Oh ya, i hope i’m not too late to say this.

Salam Ramadhan to all…

live the spirit of ramadhan!

akmalmohammad